Modesty is as Modesty Thinks,
by Penny Raine

We live in Mid Tennessee and actually get to see lots of different types of clothing. On a typical outing to the local superstore I can see women dressed in farmer’s overalls, an Amish dress, short shorts or anywhere in between. I have come to the conclusion that modesty has nothing to do with what you are actually wearing. Rather, it is an attitude.

I remember years ago being at an Amish auction. It was a cold day and we were pretty well bundled up. Some of my daughters were with me and they were between the ages of 6-13. I noticed some of the young men looking at them and it really bothered me. Even though I was there to buy a dairy cow I spent the day mostly people watching instead. I learned some interesting things. Before I share what I learned I will first tell you what I did about those young boys. I ruined their view! I had my daughter stand behind me. Like I said it was a cold day, we were all bundled up and had on big overcoats. My daughter was covered from head to toe but there was something in the air it seemed. So I had her stand behind me and it worked! Later in the day I saw a display of what was causing the problem. You will be as surprised as I was.

What I saw was a scene you would expect in a public high school cafeteria at lunchtime. “But wait”, you say, “at an Amish auction?” Surely it must have been the non-Amish teenagers behaving badly right? Nope, wrong. What I saw was a group of young Amish girls in complete head to toe Amish uniforms flirting, yes I said flirting, with the young boys! Shocking! Not only were they flirting but they were behaving very immodestly. Now, why was I so shocked? Because I think the Amish are Holy? No, I think holiness is a heart-way of life not the banner we put up in our denominational sign. I have many Amish neighbors who love Jesus and I have some that don’t have a clue who He is. Our denomination doesn’t save us, no matter who we are or where we were born or who our ancestors were, we must become born-again to understand the things of God. Which brings me back to the beginning. Modesty is a heartfelt attitude not a uniform. Those precious Amish girls had been taught the “way” without the “why”. I was shocked to see girls with no skin showing being immodest.

So how do we become modest? First we must understand that our flesh, our bodies, our mouths and even our minds can and will be used by the enemy if we are not submitted to God. There are many women who can dress properly and not have a relationship with the Lord and I think there are many reasons for that, probably having to do with prayers and relationships of generations of past family members. I believe that blessings are passed down through generations just like cursings are, but that is for another day. However to truly understand the Spirit of modesty I believe you must have a relationship with God. It is all about Him. It is all about pointing others to Him. It is all about furthering His Kingdom and not causing a brother or a potential brother to stumble. It is all about picking up our cross and following Jesus daily. Putting His purposes first and ours last.

Getting back to my Amish friends. Like I said before, being Amish, or Catholic, or Baptist, or Methodist or, ________, (you can fill in the blank) doesn’t mean you have a relationship with God. But let’s look for a moment at the Amish way of life. They have a traditional way of life and dress. The women wear long dresses with aprons and the men wear long sleeve shirts and long pants, and most of their clothing is dark. They wear the same thing in the summer, even if it is 102 degrees outside and 90% humidity, and they are working in the fields or up on a hot roof. They do it because they are dedicated to their way of life, their tradition. That pretty much ruins our use of excuses for comforts sake doesn’t it? Can we not forsake all, even our own comfort, to be a good witness for Jesus? Do we care more about His purpose or ours?

So, do we wear long sleeves or short? Do we wear all dresses or pants? How do we do this modesty thing in a way that is pleasing to Him? I have always found that the best place to start is His Word. Here is what the Lord Himself has to say,

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful.” 1 Peter 3:3-5

So there we have it. It is really very simple. We should dress in a way that draws attention to the Jesus in us, not drawing attention to us. It doesn’t matter if it is pants or dresses or long sleeves or sleeveless. It matters if we can look in the mirror and honestly say Jesus is pleased. The attitude in us should show on the outside. If we dress the way we want and think if a guy looks it is his problem then we need to go back to the drawing board. Yes there are some that will look no matter what we do, but we are still accountable for our own actions. We should care; we should care about whether they know Jesus and what are we doing to point them towards Him? Who do we care more about, Jesus or ourselves?

Penny Raine is a homeschooling mother of 8, married 20+ years to Jim Raine pastor of “The Well” in Middle TN. They live on farm in the country where everybody’s favorite thing to do is worship the Lord. She has had articles published in various magazines and websites and is always working on at least 2 books at a time.

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